Judah's Transformation
Judah is the hero of the story.
Yes, at first he was the brother who suggested and arranged the sale of Joseph. He was the one who was forced to move away from the family, because the brothers deposed him of his leadership role once they realized the terrible pain Joseph’s absence caused their father.
Yet, somewhere along the way there was a transformation. Judah assumed the role of leader of the brothers, and in the opening scene of this week’s Torah Portion we read what is certainly one of the most dramatic moments portrayed in the Torah, Judah alone, confronted the Egyptian leader.
When was Judah’s turning point? When did he transform from the brother who destroyed the unity of the family to the brother who took responsibility to defend Benjamin at great personal cost?
Let us look back in the story to search for clues to Judah’s transformation.
In last week’s portion we read about how Judah was successful where Reuben, his oldest brother, failed. The brothers tried to persuade their father to allow them to take Benjamin to Egypt, to comply with the demand of the leader of Egypt, who, unbeknownst to them was their own brother Joseph. Jacob refused to allow Benjamin, his youngest child, the son of his late most beloved wife, to go to Egypt, out of fear for his well being. Reuben, the eldest brother, the leader of the group, spoke to his father as follows:
And Reuben spoke to his father, saying, "You may put my two sons to death if I don't bring him (Benjamin) to you. Put him into my hand[s] and I will return him to you."[1]
Jacob responded:
But he (Jacob) said, "My son shall not go down with you, because his brother is dead, and he alone is left, and if misfortune befalls him on the way you are going, you will bring down my gray head in sorrow to the grave."[2]
Where Reuben failed Judah succeeded. When Jacob again requested that his sons descend to Egypt to purchase food, Judah steps in to talk to their father, Judah says:
If you send our brother with us, we will go down and buy food for you. But if you do not send [him], we will not go down, because the man said to us, 'You shall not see my face if your brother is not with you.'[3]
Judah then continues:
And Judah said to Israel, his father, "Send the lad with me, and we will get up and go, and we will live and not die, both we and you and also our young children. I will guarantee him; from my hand you can demand him. If I do not bring him to you and stand him up before you, I will have sinned against you forever. For had we not tarried, by now we would have already returned twice."[4]
Judah was successful. Jacob agreed to send Benjamin.
Why? What did Judah say or do that was that different from what Reuben said?
Judah understood what leadership meant. He understood that his job as a leader was to empower others, in this case his father, to take responsibility. Judah understood that as long as the brothers were the ones pleading with Jacob to send Benjamin, Jacob would not agree. Judah understood that his job as a leader was to place the decision in Jacob’s hands, pointing out that the ramifications of the decision would be completely on Jacob’s conscience.
Judah did not try to persuade his father. He did, however, tell his father that the decision whether or not they would go down to Egypt was in their father's hand. He tells his father “had we not tarried, by now we would have already returned twice"[5].
What Judah did was he forced his father to make the decision. Once his father had to decide, Judah was sure that his father would make the right choice.[6]
Where did Judah learn this important truth about leadership? Where did he learn that the key to leading someone to do the right thing is by placing the responsibility in their hands?
The person who was responsible for Judah’s transformation and ultimate leadership role within the Jewish people was Tamar.
Looking back to one portion before the last, we read about Judah’s daughter-in-law, Tamar, who Judah sentences to death for adultery. In fact, Tamar disguised as a harlot, became pregnant from Judah himself, who she was entitled to marry, since someone from Judah’s family had an obligation to marry her due to the law of the Levirate marriage.
Tamar had Judah’s staff and signet as evidence that Judah was in fact the father of her unborn twin children and thus she was not guilty of adultery. She did not proclaim her innocence by shaming Judah. Instead, she forced Judah to make a choice. Tamar forced Judah to choose between making the right moral choice or between allowing Tamar and her unborn children to be killed:
She was taken out, and she sent to her father in law, saying, "From the man to whom these belong I am pregnant," and she said, "Please recognize whose signet ring, cloak, and staff are these?"[7]
Judah then realized that he must choose, and that the choice he would make would lay on his conscience and on his conscience alone, forever.
Courageously, Judah made the morally correct choice:
Then Judah recognized [them], and he said, "She is right, [it is] from me, because I did not give her to my son Shelah."[8]
Tamar transformed Judah. She taught him how to assume responsibility.
Judah, in turn, internalized her message. When it came time to influence Jacob, Judah empowered Jacob, by highlighting that the responsibility lay in Jacob’s hands.
And when Judah himself saw disaster about to strike, when he saw the Egyptian leader trying to enslave Benjamin, he took Tamar’s message to heart: Don't shy away. Don't wait for one of your brothers to step in. Realize that the solution to this problem will come only when you take action. Realize that G-d is waiting for you to make the right choice.
[1] Genesis 42:37.
[2] Genesis 42:38.
[3] Genesis 43:4-5.
[4] Genesis 43:8-10.
[5] Genesis 43:8-10.
[6] From a class by Rabbi Ezra Bik.
[7] Genesis 38:25.
[8] Genesis 38:26.