How to Criticize Effectively A Kohen {a member of the priestly family who would perform the Temple service} represents the attribute of love. In the Ethics of Our Fathers, the Mishnah teaches: “be of the descendants of Aaron {the patriarch of the priestly family}, a lover of peace, a pursuer of peace, one who loves the creatures and draws them close to Torah”. The feeling of love is integral to the role of a Kohen. Until this very day, when the priests fulfill the commandment to bless the Jewish people, they recite the blessing “Blessed… who commanded us to bless his people Israel with love”. The blessing defines the commandment as one which not only commands to bless but also to bless with love. In fact, the reason the Kohen’s words elicit Divine blessing is because the blessing is recited with love. Yet, in our Torah portion, the Kohen also has a very different role. It is specifically the Kohen who can declare a person impure with the ailment of Tzaraat. While determining whether an affliction is indeed Tzaraat requires the expertise of a sage, nevertheless it is not the sage who can declare the person impure; but rather, the sage notifies the Kohen that the affliction is umpire, and the Kohen is the one who must pronounce it impure. As Maimonides codifies the law: The designation of a person as impure or pure is dependent on a Kohen. What is implied? If there is a Kohen who does not know how to assess blemishes, a sage should observe them and instruct him: "Say 'You are impure,' and the Kohen says: "You are impure;" "Say 'You are pure,'" and the Kohen says: "You are pure." "Isolate him," and he isolates him… Even if a Kohen is a minor or intellectually or emotionally incapable, the sage instructs him and he declares the person definitively impure, releases him from the inspection process, or isolates him. (Maimonides Laws of Tzaraat 9:2) Why is this the only law in the Torah which requires a Kohen to decide a matter of law? The Tzaarat is, in some ways, the most severe form of impurity, requiring the Metzora {person afflicted with Tzaarat} to “dwell isolated, his dwelling shall be outside the camp”. This, precisely, is the reason the Torah demands that specifically a Kohen, whose spiritual makeup and communal responsibility is to love his people, be the one to declare a person impure. For the Kohen will not declare anyone impure unless it is absolutely necessary to do so. When the Kohen is forced to declare a person impure, the Kohen’s empathy, concern, and love will allow the person to accept the Kohen’s declaration without becoming defensive, enabling him to begin spiritual rehabilitation that will ultimately render him pure once again. A google search on “how to criticize effectively” will yield many good techniques, but, in our Parsha, the Torah teaches that the most important factor in effective criticism is the way in which it is given. The way the recipient of the criticism, be it a child, college employee, or friend, is able to accept the criticism is when they sense that the critique is motivated by your love and concern. Adapted from the teachings of the Rebbe, Lekutei Sichos Tazria vol. 27 Sicha 2.
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